..the invisible mode !

It's 11 at night. You just finished your dinner after a hectic day at work. Your laptop is still on the standby mode. You decide to wind up things for the day and doze off but by doing that you feel a little restless. All the while stuck amidst work or people related to work, you feel retarded. You log in to your Gmail account and see a whole bunch of people online. A mixture of people from your high school, your neighbourhood and of course your workplace, some with tacky captions, some interestingly high, some absurdly low, while some with an expressionless red dot before their names. Somehow you don't want others to notice you for various reasons best known to yourself and the interesting part is that no one is actually aware that you are online, because you are invisible !

Why can't life have such an invisible mode? 

Sometimes we wish if we could just hide without actually hiding. Sometimes we just want to watch things happening around without being noticed. Sometimes we wish we didn't exist and could still roam around places checking out what life is without us and have the special power to re-exist the next moment. How exciting it would be to not exist for some period of time in life, to vanish into an invisible mode so that no one knows where you are, what you are upto & whether you really subsist or not.


Organizations would then put up a clause in the offer letter of the so called invisible mode like they do for holidays. Lovers would promise each other that if at all they go invisible they would do  that together, and parents would warn their children not to vanish without permission.

Imagine what a break we would get out of this life which sometimes seems impossible. Living a life other than the original life which has no communication networks, no bugging phone calls, and no disgusting relationships. Just a truly lonesome soul watching everything that is happening in the world just as we normally do, but who would have the power to come back where he had left.

What a life it would be ..if that happened !!

..back to school !!

February 21, 2010: Helpless and tired, after restlessly lying down for a long time that seemed unending I checked my watch, it showed 05.45am. I couldn't believe that I had not slept even for a minute all night long and the worst part was that I had to appear for the Common Entrance Test (CET) in less than 8 hours, supposedly my last attempt at B-school entrance tests.There was an unusual stir in my head. I somehow managed to find a paracetamol pill inside the drawer. That was the only thing that would help my brain relax and induce the much needed sleep. I went back to bed.

      At 09.55am I got up with a jerk. Looking at the watch I started counting the number of hours I had slept for. "More than 3" I said to myself and smiled.

         After an uneasy two and a half hours of the CET exam (Uneasy because I had got a seat right in front of the loo) I made my way out of the main gate of the esteemed Jamnalal Bajaj Institute of Management Studies. Just when I was about to leave I turned back and clicked a photograph of the wall which had JBIMS logo carved on it. The picture looked pretty awesome, but somewhere something was missing. I couldn’t understand what it was. I thought for a while & left.

July 28, 2010: It was a beautiful rainy morning when I reached JBIMS. I had got my results the other day and yeah,as per the rankings I was one of those 120 lucky people who made it there, Jamnalal Bajaj –A dream come true!

          

            Moving into the premises I took my camera out, focussed it onto the same wall which had  the institute name and logo carved on it, and this time the photograph looked different.

 Through those lenses along with the JBIMS logo I saw myself. I saw myself getting up every damn morning year after year running behind a career, a goal, a dream. I saw myself bunking at work just because I had a CAT/CET seminar to attend.  I saw myself slogging and hunting for improvements in my mock tests. I saw myself managing my personal & professional life to the best I could. I saw myself planning about my future while taking the morning shower, I saw myself de-motivated when I had lost this MMS seat by 4 marks the other year. I saw my parents supporting me when I was low, I saw myself being criticised by some people whom I thought were my friends. I saw myself staying up all night due to an agitated brain with my CET exam the next day. I saw myself shiver just before the results were to be displayed. I saw myself praying at the every possible temple and at the every possible church. And in the end I saw myself smiling, the way I had never smiled before.

Now the picture looked perfect !

"I am back to school .." I said to myself jumping with joy.

Glad to tell you guys, JBIMS is reloaded, and I am one of the bullets.... Cheers ;-)